<%@ Language=Inherit from Web %> "Requiem For Myself"

Requiem For Myself

Bring Me All Your Flowers Now

"I would rather have a single rose from the garden of a friend, Than have the choicest flowers when my stay on earth must end.

I would rather have the kindest words which may now be said to me, Than flattered when my heart is still and this life has ceased to be.

I would rather have a loving smile from the friends I know are true, Than tears shed 'round my casket when this world I've bade adieu!

Bring me all your flowers, whether pink, or white, or red.  I'd rather have one blossom now Than a truckload when I'm dead!"

Michael W. Connett

The Desire:
In many ways I have lived two separate lives with two "families" and in each I have been touched by, and hopefully have touched in return, many people.  I'd like them all to be able to say good-bye and celebrate all that was good in my life, because although there was a lot of stormy weather the sun and rainbows did come out eventually.  Unfortunately, my two lives were never integrated because of fear, misunderstanding, unacceptance, intolerance, etc., etc.  For this reason I have tried to design a requiem in two parts that will enable my two lives to come together in peace and harmony to 'celebrate me home' and set me at rest.  I'd like everyone to feel welcome, comfortable and accepted at both parts, but for those members of either family who may be uncomfortable with the other, I'll understand if you only take part in one and not the other.  

The Body:
My body is only a shell that houses my essence; a heart and soul.  Therefor, to me, it is only important that my essence be preserved.  I don't want one of those funerals where they drag the body into some sad, somber ceremony and then drag it out to be thrown in a depressing grave in an out-of-the-way, inconvenient location  that no one would want to visit.  I want to be cremated and my ashes divided, half to be entrusted to each of my families.  More about this later...  

The Time:
3 - 4 weeks after I've gone I'd like the following two parts of my requiem to be conducted by those I've designated.  Both parts should be held on the same day, one after the other.  I would suggest a Sunday afternoon/evening time frame.  

The Events:

Memorial Mass              Celebration of a Life 

The Directors:

Frank Connett &                                      Curtis Caldwell &
Kathleen Connett                                      Dale Combs  

With a Little Help From My Friends:

My Family                                              Gary Franzen
Judy Boyd Meyer                                    Jeff Boss
Sande Turner Shepherd                          Stan Gooden
Bob & Donna Berendsen                      Hurricane Summers
Mr. Kevin O'Toole                                 Jon Boston

The rest of what I leave you here is an outline and suggestions, the rest is up to you!  Over the time (several - if not many - years, I hope!) I have left, I will gather together other materials to leave with and assist you in your task.  I trust that whatever you come up with will make us all smile together!
 
Mass                                                      Celebration
1. Lots of Music: Choral, recorded, whatever.                  1. Ditto!
2. From the Christian Brothers:Choral arrangement       2. Cocktails!
     "Mass of Joy" by Bro. Rob Scheiblhofer
3. Balloons & Flowers                                                    3. Hors D'oeuvres

4. Bells of Joy - no funeral tolls!                                   4. Chatting/Mellow Music
5. Pictures                                                                    5. Entertainment
6. Readings that I treasure, some of my                         6. Pictures
    own writings even. "The Prophet' by Gibran

7. Conversation                                                             7. Fireworks

2/19/94
MWC/
Attachments

Welcome Back! to my broader view of the World around My CommUNITY.  As some of you may be aware, I had announced post World AIDS Day that I would be taking a hiatus over the Holidays.  Unfortunately, my system crashed at that time and I lost all my data with  little back-up.

In the meantime, regarding the Mama Dowager's kind words, I wanted to share this with y'all:

In Dr. Coveys presentation of The 7 Habits on tape, he explains that ”Habit #2 - The Leadership Habit:   “BEGIN With The END In MIND...”    Literally means to Begin Today with an image or picture of the End of your Life as your Frame of Reference.  As the criteria by which you examine every thing else in Your Life.  He continues by asking you to visualize your funeral where there are to be 4 speakers; A Family member, A Community Leader, A Colleague, and A Friend.  And finally, he instructs you to pick those four speakers...

Thanks for being on my list and allowing me to share my Journey with y'all.

Best Regards, Michael

-----Original Message-----
From: Mama Dowager
Goddess Knows - this is one place where you can let it all hang out...and at our respective ages - well...there are some things that are hanging out...and it ain't all pretty   by  "some folks" definitions...but they will taken out in good time...I'm sure...

Ms. Connett and I go back to the formation of the earth or there about...he's a great person...and crazy...and  that is the best endorsement any girl can give to a long term sister...and a dare say in his craziness  he's done one heap of good for the queendom...

Mama Dowager from the trash pit called the Hazelhurst Mobile Home Park in the Mt. Healthy  but we ain't more healthy and far less wise..

Dear Gang - some of you of I've not had the pleasure of meeting, but hey - what the heck, I am not much one to stand on any formality. Besides, since I met Michael at the formation of the earth, as Mother Dowager by default, I most certainly know of your spirit.

I probably never mentioned to Michael I retired this past year from Procter & Gamble after 18 and a half years. This wasn't an easy 18 and a half years for an openly gay guy in that time frame - but ya know - it was a "nasty job and ya know I just had to do it." But all kidding aside - there are some really great people there and I'll let you in on a few secrets I learned most people there truly wanted things to change but were afraid to take risk and to make change - after all, supporting kids, and paying for college - ya makes your choices ya know?

Another thing - before the great cut backs and purges, and I went through 3 of 'em (while I was being written up and beaten up by HR) - I took and participated in a number of company sponsored Steve R. Covey courses on the ole "7 Habits."  I know in the past several years Michael as often mentioned Dr. Covey - but until now, I have not shared my personal knowledge of his courses or his work - funny how it resonated with both of us?

Mama Dowager from the Paradise of the Trailer Park

Copyright©:

The Michael W. Connett Living Trust

Page last updated: Wednesday, April 14, 2010 3:21 AM